Lyrics: Sven Amann
Melody: Portal OST
This was the OPhase…
We make a note here, huge success.
It's hard to overstate our satisfaction.
Next comes your Bachelor of Science,
You will learn what you must, because… you must.
Learn it all to pass exams, Though it's of no further use…
There is no sense crying over every failed exam!
Since you've got three tries till you receive the final ban…
Only then your time is gone, but you're not the only one,
and with luck you will be still alive.
Now it's too early to cry!
'cause you're right at the start of it by now.
And we've got some systems here to guide you.
One of those was the OPhase.
Another one is the Mentorensystem.
And of course there is the one and only TUCaN for you!
So you see there's really nothing likely to go wrong.
Ev'ry thing is done for you, that's the message of this song!
Just lean back enjoy the ride, let the TUCaN be your guide,
And be sure you won't get out alive!
You'll get kicked and you'll leave here…
While all of you friends are shire to stay behind.
But don't cry 'cause they will daily see you!
During you work at the Mensa.
To us that's a joke, to you the last chance.
Anyways our lifes are great and yours of no further use!
Look at me still talking to you, whose got work to do.
Cleaning dishes, spoons and knifes… man, I'm glad I'm not you!
If I was I'd you a gun, but it's you who's done and gone,
and whose lucky to be still alive!
And believe me it's luck you're alive!
We're doing science while you're still alive!
We feel FANTASTIC and you're still alive…
We laugh about you while you're still alive!
'cause you'll be poor for the rest of your life!
Of your life… Still alive...
